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The Ripple Effect. Kathy Staran on paying it forward.

By on July 1, 2013
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As a child, I was always taught to live by the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  This really struck a chord with me as a child, and at the age of 54, I still attempt to follow this tenet in all my dealings with others.  Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. In most cases, I have found that it works very well and I end up feeling great afterward.  I have also read many times about how doing a good dead for another human being during the day can have a positive effect upon you as well as have a ripple effect, as the person who you did the good deed for may pass it along to other during the course of their day, too. It’s a very good feeling to be able to do something like this for someone else, i.e., holding the door open, assisting an elderly person in getting from point A to point B, saying hello to someone who has a sad, lost or blank look in their eyes, picking something up that someone has dropped, etc. The smile is SO worth it and the surprised, pleased thank you is always nice to hear, as well.

Most of us have seen the advertisement on television, where one person does a good deed, and then the person to whom the deed has been done passes it on, and so on and so on. I believe that this is true, and that this DOES occur in real life.

I believe that the key is being open, in the moment, and aware of our surroundings.

So many of us get caught up in the day to day events of life that we go through our days on auto-pilot, and, looking back at the end of the day, we can barely remember what we did, much less who we came into contact with. When you attempt to do a good deed each day, it is such a joyous feeling at the end of the day to realize that you may have made someone’s day brighter just for being there, for assisting them, saying hello to them, or smiling at them!

In these times of electronic communication, people are becoming so used to staying in contact with others via email, texting, social networking, etc., that it comes as a pleasant surprise when they are acknowledged with a smile, a quick hello, or an assist when they need it. We can get so caught up in this way of communication that we can literally end up not speaking with another human being for days at a time! This simply is not healthy, as we all require a human connection with others in order to survive, thrive and grow. It is vital that we make the attempt to communicate with others in person each day, as this contact enhances our development and evolution as humans. We need others to help us remember that we are alive, vital people!

Reaching out to others, even though we do not know them, or may never see them again, is a way to accomplish this, as it spreads good feelings, and an assurance in the goodness of our fellow man. It just feels good! 

Here’s an experiment to try: (Set a goal to do one good deed per day.)

1. Smile at someone you encounter during the course of your day,

2. Hold a door open for someone behind you

3. Call or visit a friend in person with whom you haven’t spoken with in a while, instead of e-mailing, face-book messaging, or using another method of contact.

4. Instead of forwarding that funny e-mail, send a personalized email or call.

5. Schedule a date for coffee, a meal or a night out.

People so appreciate that personal touch or contact. You will be stunned at the responses you receive from others, even those you don’t personally know. People are so pleased to be acknowledged and respected, because they are not used to others doing things for them. And hey, maybe they will pass it along; this could become a national phenomenon. Just think: instead of being labeled The Ugly Americans,we could be known as friendly, open and outgoing people, always willing to lend a helping hand, even when there hasn’t been a recent crisis which they are reacting to. We could become known as the country of friendly, loving people!

Kathy-GlassesKathy Staran has been writing for over 25 years on a freelance basis, has written articles for various online magazines, and also has published two fiction novels with her husband, Mike. She is also an Interior Designer, specializing in remodeling projects and real estate staging, and is an accomplished ceramic artist as well, specializing in functional pottery pieces and sculpture. She currently splits her time between Troy, Michigan and Marina del Rey, California, and shares her life with her husband and their two cats, Grayson and Tucker.

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