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The Empowered Woman's Guide to Healthy Relationships

By on September 26, 2016
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By Geraldine Asuncion

A relationship is only as good as the sum of its parts.

When two people come together with the hope that one will complete the other, the integrity of the relationship becomes compromised. A thriving relationship is built with two whole individuals, and the willingness to continue to grow. It requires you to dive into a deep inquiry about who you are, what you want and how to maintain your core values. An Empowered Woman is in the driver’s seat of her relationship. She takes care of her heart by rooting it to a strong sense of Self.

Here are 5 ways you can start being an empowered woman in your relationship:

#1 Be Clear About What You Want

“Know thyself.” – Greek proverb

Knowing what you want requires you to know yourself.

By developing a deep understanding of who you are, you are less likely to make the type of compromises that shatter your Self and your dreams. You are more inclined to speak your truth and take an active role in fulfilling your desires. The art of knowing what you want is born out of a lifelong commitment to personal growth and self-discovery. It means you are willing to remain in solidarity with your true self and continue on a path to knowing more. Knowing yourself takes the responsibility off of your partner and places you back at the helm of your life’s journey. When you accept responsibility for your happiness and your truth, you change the landscape of your relationship, making it a beautiful and life-affirming experience.

#2 Maintain Healthy Boundaries

“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others” – Brene Brown

Healthy boundaries are the sacred containers for your soul.

Boundaries are how you cultivate and maintain self-respect. When you honor your boundaries, you set a precedent for how you would like to be treated by others. Having healthy boundaries makes it easier for your partner to know how to be with you. Some of the biggest triggers in relationships have their roots in poor boundaries and the inability to communicate the boundaries you do have. A level of ease and flow arises within a relationship when healthy boundaries are honored and trusted. It removes all the guesswork, creating deeper intimacy and lasting connection.

#3 Do Your Thing

“You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

Maintaining the Me in We is a gift to yourself and your partner.

There is a natural tendency to draw yourself as close to your partner as you can. It feels safe, comfortable and secure. But the price for losing yourself in your relationship may cost the relationship itself.

You can enrich your relationship with much more when you cultivate the practice of “me time“. When you make self-care a priority, you fill up your resources and have more available to offer.

Maintaining a healthy ME means you give yourself permission to go out into the world alone, have solo date nights, or hang out with friends. You enjoy space from your partner and your kids and continue to discover things that bring you joy.

Doing your thing cultivates a strong sense of self, making you more interesting and desirable.

#4 Communicate from the “I”

“Personal responsibility is the new sexy.” – Geraldine Asuncion

When you communicate from the “I“, you maintain control of your life and open up to personal transformation, rather than feeling helpless in the face of your challenges. Each time you blame someone or something outside yourself you relinquish that control and set yourself up for a reactive approach to your life. When you communicate from the “I”, it shifts the focus from blaming to reflecting, and you can begin to ask yourself questions like: “How can I change this situation?”, “What can I learn here?”, “How could I have communicated that better?”, “What was my role in the infidelity?” Nothing is sexier and empowering than giving up the need to be right and taking ownership of your peace and happiness.

#5 Tell the Truth

“Be impeccable with your word.” – Don Miguel Ruiz

You invite resentment into your relationship when you don’t speak your truth.

The success of a relationship is not measured by the time you spent in it. It’s measured by how often you were in your truth. If you withhold your truth for the sake of connection, you are compromising the quality of that connection. Strength and power can be found in your willingness to have clear communication, even if it risks putting the relationship on the table. Be open and vulnerable. Speak what feels great, speak what needs to shift, and speak up for your desires. Be real. By honoring your voice, you share deeper parts of yourself and you give your partner permission to do the same.

 

gerria_homepageGeraldine Asuncion is an intuitive relationship coach based in Oakland, CA.  Her work supports women and young women cultivate a stronger sense of self.

For over 25 years Geraldine has been touching the lives of her clients through her mastery of bodywork and massage therapy.  Her relationship coaching practice was born out of the need to support her clients in creating a bridge from unresolved issues, which manifest as pain in the body, to fulfilling relationships with themselves and their partners.

As part of her work with women, Geraldine is also committed to helping organizations which support young women in developing skills and confidence to have the best opportunity to a have a healthy and fulfilling life.

She is also the author of the soon to be released, “I Am Not Your Girlfriend”, a memoir about the betrayal of her true self and the false identity she created as a “girlfriend”.

For more information about cultivating healthy relationships, and how you can start to feel more confident and empowered visit www.geraldineasuncion.com.

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