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Solo in the Suburbs – A Womens Guide To Falling Behind

By on July 20, 2024
Reflecting on an unconventional journey at 27

by Christine Thompson

At the halfway mark of year 27, I find myself thinking about where I am and where I thought I’d be. I’ve been to so many baby showers, weddings, and housewarming parties in the past year and a half that I’ve lost count. I didn’t get my bachelor’s degree until I was 26, and I won’t finish grad school until I’m 29. My full-time job and my dog take up most of my time, which is considered a red flag when looking at adults who are that far behind in life.

A few months ago, I met someone at a wedding and ended up sharing my story. The look on their face—a mix of pity and confusion—left me wondering. Is my lifestyle really that unusual? Should I feel embarrassed that I’m not as far along as I’d hoped to be?

For the last five years, I’ve been in nothing but situationships—those fun, unpredictable relationships that never seem to go anywhere. As my generation moves forward, it’s becoming more normal to skip traditional milestones like marriage and kids. Yet, the idea of the white picket fence still lingers. We’ve been taught since childhood that not following the norm is weird.

While I support my friends and family who live that lifestyle, I march to a different beat. Sometimes, I wonder if I’m jealous of their achievements. How did they find love and start families? How did they launch their careers at 22? Will I ever want the same things? The pressure to conform is real, especially with the constant stream of “perfect” lives on social media. Engagement posts, baby announcements, and housewarming parties can feel like reminders of what I still need to achieve. But it’s important to remember that everyone’s timeline is different, and success and happiness aren’t one-size-fits-all.

I often wonder if I’ll ever meet someone who understands and appreciates my journey. Will I find a partner who values my independence and unconventional choices? Or will I keep facing pity and misunderstanding from those who can’t see past traditional milestones?

Despite these doubts, I find comfort in the freedom of living life on my terms. Something is empowering about embracing your individuality and not settling for anything less than what feels right. So, as I prepare for my next dateless wedding surrounded by couples and societal expectations, I remind myself that my relationship status or reproductive choices don’t determine my worth. My journey is just as valid, and my achievements are just as meaningful. Here’s to celebrating the path less taken and finding joy in every step along the way.

As Carrie Bradshaw once said, “The most exciting, challenging, and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love you, and you love, well, that’s just fabulous.”

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Christine ThompsonChristine Thompson is a youthful professional with a zest for life and a passion for creativity. Balancing a love for adventure with a career as a teacher and freelancer, she strives to inspire others while continuously learning and growing herself.

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