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darcy lubow embraces her choices (frozen yogurt and all.)

By on June 14, 2013
frozen medley

So, I have the opportunity every day, even every hour, to either apologize for or justify what I like, prefer, choose or to claim it all with honesty and confidence.

by Darcy Lubow.

I eat a frozen yogurt almost daily that could feed a family of four. I love this and buying this scrumptious treat is an ordeal some days. Commentary from others choosing their flavors and sizes, expressions of curiosity, horror, and astonishment meet me as I bite from this mountainous bowl of deliciousness. Even the tiniest tots reveal their curiosity in refreshingly honest and unabashed ways. “I want that” left the lips of a maybe 5 year old boy recently as he eyed my choice. Smiling to him and his dad, it was almost as if this little boy, so honest and straight forward, was speaking for his dad as well, who was staring down my chocolate peanut butter confection with longing.

Questions and comments about what I choose can give rise to my own insecurities, feeling out of place, wondering if there is something wrong with me, with my choices, with what I like. The truth is, I really enjoy the ritual of getting frozen yogurt, eating part of it on the way home and finishing the rest after dinner. It is unnecessary and extravagant. No one is hurt or negatively affected by this routine, including myself. Food is meant to be taken in with delight, right? Eating dessert and feeling shame because of what I want, like, choose negates the purpose of a treat! Feeding my body and spirit, combining my preferences with happiness is what living is all about. So, I have a choice, every day in one form or another. The choice: to adopt negativity, judgment, apologize for my preferences or experience pleasure in ways that feed me, claim my choices, celebrate what I do and enjoy what is! Heck, shame can become playfulness as I walk out of the yogurt shoppe with my frozen treat in hand. I am going to do what I do, so I might as well do it with a smile.

Taken in the context of physical food or not, what we feed ourselves through the choices we make add up to the life we life on a grand scale. Are you choosing soulful nourishment? Big question, I know. Let’s ponder this together. If we get real, just for a moment now, can you say with complete honesty that you are feeding yourself with what you truly need and desire?

Take a pause, breathe in and out a few times (this, by the way, is a way to nourish your body and mind simultaneously!) and let the answer to this question surface from your inner wisdom.

If the answer is a big yes across the board of your life, congratulations!!!

There are areas that might be charged with conscious choices and a resounding “yes” coming to you. This is a beautiful opportunity to celebrate!

Likely there are also some creaky, perhaps frustrated “no” responses making themselves known as well. This, too, is worthy of celebration!

I know, I know, an odd response you might be thinking. I see the breakthroughs coming! Check me out, here.

Becoming aware of what our inner guidance is telling us is profound. The messages are sometimes subtle. Other times they blare with unrelenting enthusiasm (or even tantrums, depending on how long they have been ignored). With awareness comes the ability to make conscious choices, to direct ourselves where we want to go, to get re-aligned. Taking a few steps off course happens. It is what we do when we get centered and notice that we are not on the road of self love at the moment that dictates the rest. We can step back on our road at any time, we can even create a new path that fits our current needs better. (How fun is that!?) The help and support of those around us (a spiritual community, a coach, family, a tribe of women doing their own work and play), an active prayer life, physical exercise (with our tribe of ladies, perhaps?) and scheduled dates with ourselves to meditate bring self love into focus. No one else can choose for us. This is the beauty and responsibility of being an empowered woman. We learn and grow with others, not necessarily from others. As enlightening, encouraging, fun, engaging and awe-inspiring as the learning process can be (and as a self proclaimed lifelong learner, I mean this!), the wisdom gained from outside really is just a reflection of what we already have inside. We pick up tools and techniques as we journey forward, adopting our own design for life.

In the moments of humanness that are bound to arise, whether in the line at the store or sitting on a mat in silence, (insecurity, people pleasing, confusion, overwhelm and fear to name a few) there lies a choice. One that has yet to let me down is taking a conscious breathe and asking my inner wisdom what I would do if no one else was watching, or better yet, if everyone was watching and cheering me on for following my bliss. Life gets fun when I get real, with myself, and lead by example. Conscious, empowered, transparent self love, here I am!

Your turn:

What are you choosing today?

Is it coming with a smile or scowl?

Empowered Conscious Choice is a great teacher, I’m bringing her with me to ride shot gun.

How about you?

 

DarcyLubowHeadshotDarcy Lubow is a natural guide. She helps lead people through the dark forests of the mind to a place of serenity. Darcy is a coach, a SoulCollage(TM) facilitator, a motivational speaker and a Masters in Counseling Psychology candidate. She lives with her beloved dog, Duffy, in Northern California.  Darcy feels most alive when she is creating, loving, learning and laughing. She fills her life with love: practicing yoga, taking photographs and walking down new streets in the “same old neighborhoods”.

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