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Check yourself with Darcy Lubow.
Today was a fabulously trouble-free day. Simple pleasures and productivity met as I showed up for myself and others, gave and received, checked a few to do’s off the list and took a stroll in the sun. The majority of the thoughts I was entertaining were encouraging, or at least neutral, and I felt gratefully at peace. It was a full day, no problems in sight.
Then, all of a sudden, things came crashing down. My muscles and head started aching, I discovered a drenched kitchen floor and cracked pipe under the sink, a full bottle of shampoo dropped on my toe, then came the conditioner. The phone started ringing, the dog barked at what, I cannot tell you, and I felt overwhelmed. My thoughts took a turn and I was questioning whether I am, in fact, doing enough, if everything is okay. The inner critic was well energized and giving me her three cents. The calm and content was out of sight and I wanted it back. Now. Initially bummed and discouraged, then I remembered one of my tools, a technique that brings me back to center anytime and anywhere. I went back to basics.
First, I stopped. Right there in the kitchen amidst the water, ringing and barking, I took a long, slow, deep breath.
Then, I asked what to do next. “Put a bucket under the sink” was the guidance, so I followed it; Simple, straightforward, helpful.
Next, I checked in with my body. What did I need right then and there? Was I hungry? Was I angry? Was I lonely? Was I tired? (HALT) Check & check. I was hungry and tired. So, before anything else was addressed, I made a snack and sat down to eat it. By now, the phone had stopped ringing, the dog was sitting by my side, and my mind was quieter. Yes, the floor was wet. Yes, there was a mess. Did I like it? No. But how important was it really? [A life saver question I ask often] A wet floor stays wet for a few more minutes or I rejuvenate a body and mind that work for me twenty four seven? Did I want to prioritize cleaning it up and put off the basics of self-care? Yes. Instead, I added my name to the top of the to do list! In ten minutes or less, the things to tend to were all addressed.
I checked in with the thoughts and questioned their validity.
I reminded the inner critic that she is safe and I am in charge.
I said a few affirmations and felt them soothe my sore spots.
I drank a glass of water and took some vitamin C.
I sat in silence and let the food fill me, rubbing my feet gently and intently.
I took a time out and returned to a place of peaceful presence.
When I got up, the wet floor was no big deal. In less than ten minutes! The situation hadn’t changed, my perspective had. Checking myself changed everything.
Have you had one of these moments, or maybe a few?
What if you checked yourself more often? How might your perspective and experience change?
Give it a try and get back to basics:
– Am I hungry?
– Am I angry?
– Am I lonely?
– Am I tired?
– How important is this (situation, thought, chore)? Does it really need to be done now or is something else more important?
– What do I really need right now?
– What might become available if I put myself at the top of the to do list?
Any shifts in perspective already?
Getting Back to Basics,
Darcy
Darcy Lubow is a natural guide. She helps lead people through the dark forests of the mind to a place of serenity. Darcy is a certified yoga instructor, a coach, a SoulCollage(TM) facilitator, a motivational speaker and a Masters in Counseling Psychology candidate. She lives with her beloved dog, Duffy, in Northern California. Darcy feels most alive when she is creating, loving, learning and laughing. She fills her life with love: practicing yoga, taking photographs and walking down new streets in the “same old neighborhoods”. www.darcylubow.com